“The 46 missing artworks were definitely never in my house, and were definitely never sold on privately by me. They probably got thrown away and you won’t find them” said the leader of Maashorst Council, sat in his recently bought mansion.

The Abbot of Wallingford’s flock,
Built a Mechanical Clock,
His ultimate goal,
Was the “winding up” hole,
Which he operated using his small key

There once was an Abbot called Rick,
Who had a mechanical trick,
A timekeeping gear,
Was affixed to his rear,
And the chimes were attached to his nose

Hmm, unless anyone can think of anything that rhymes with “clock” or “Rick”, I can’t really think of a way to make these sound rude.

Hahahaha. That’s brilliant :)

TIL that browsers show a number in the “:D box” if you don’t have enough tabs open.

Hahahaha, he’s very high on the list :)

Obviously it depends who you’re talking to, or what about, but yeah. Constantly in some cases.

P.S. In case you weren’t aware, it means “a lady’s front bottom” in British English, rather than the arse, as it means in American English.

Nothing if the legislation was written properly.

Not good if the legislation was written badly.

It’s hard to put them into a 1st, 2nd, 3rd position.

What about Bum Farto?

Dick Trickle?

Or even Fanny Chmelar?

This is really interesting, thank you :)

I wonder what percentage of these were made up by Boris Johnson writing for the Daily Telegraph in the mid-90s?